Three priests were in a railroad station on their way home to Pittsburgh. Behind the ticket counter was a very sexy, shapely, well endowed woman wearing a very tight, skimpy sweater. She made the three priests very nervous, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets. The first priest approached the window. "Young lady, I would like three pickets to titsburg." He completely lost his composure and fled. The second priest goes to the window.
"Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nipples and dimes." Mortified, he too fled. "Morons...." the third priest mutters and moves to the window. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And, if you insist on dressing like that, when you get to the pearly gates, St. Finger's going to shake his Peter at you." They took the bus.