Watch out for these new viruses -
Neither Symantec or McAfee have
solutions as yet!

The George Bush Virus - Causes your computer to keep looking for
viruses of mass destruction.

The Ronald Reagan Virus - Saves your data, but forgets where it is
stored.

The Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard Drive with NO
memory.

The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just keep counting and
re-counting.

The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then
e-mails everyone about what it did.
The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some files, leaves, but
will be back.

The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes.

The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 200 GB hard drive shrinks to 100 GB,
then slowly expands to re-stabilize
around 150 GB.

The Jack Kevorkian Virus - Deletes all old files.

The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted.

The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor
doesn't care.

The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5inch floppy then discards it through Windows.